Monday, March 19, 2012

Dear Jenny

I have, for about the 1000th time, been looking for a way to jumpstart my blogging.  What I've come up with this time is the idea of writing to a friend, telling her what's happening with me, and showing her the art I've been working on.  I picked a woman named Jenny, who I knew down in the Caribbean in the early 80's, when we were both living on sailboats.  We've kept in touch, usually once a year at the holidays.  She doesn't read my blog - as far as I know - but if this idea works out, I'll have to let her know that I've been writing to her! 

Dear Jenny,

This afternoon we meet the surgeon who will be doing my hip replacement operation.  There's just a little over two weeks left till the surgery. 

These last couple weeks, I've been thinking back to all the pain I've been living with for so many years.  And all the things that I haven't been able to do, even back when I was still working at the library.  Sometimes I'd take a patron back to the stacks to help them find a book, and I could have made a bet ahead of time that the book we wanted would be on the bottom shelf!  I'd have to point at the book, and the patron would bend down to retrieve it.  I've had x-rays, MRI, physical therapy, meds, etc.  I've had back pain, pains down my legs, and sore knees.  How come no one ever figured out I have a bad hip?

I guess the difference this time, when I went to the doctor's, was that I wasn't talking about back pain.  I told my GP that my hip was really bothering me, and he suggested an x-ray.  He came back somewhat amazed to tell me that there is absolutely no cartilage left in my hip.  Bone rubbing on bone....  Of course, after that, I got sent to the bone doctor.  We were scheduled to see a Physician's Assistant there, and I saw him doing some dictation while we were being settled into the examination room.  Later, through the closed door, I heard him go "Oh!" and then "Oh!" again.  I joked to Ed that the PA must have been looking at my x-rays - which we'd brought with us.  It turns out I was right!  When we met Steve, he looked at me kind of funny, like why was I still walking around? 

I guess now I'll have to say that my depression and my pain are joined at the hip!  Literally.  I can't help but wonder if getting rid of a lot of the pain will lessen my depression.  Wow, and wouldn't that be something?


1 comment:

Robin said...

It was wonderful to see you too and I do so hope that the surgery will not only lessen your pain but your depression as well. There is documentation that supports chronic pain sufferers do suffer from depression as could you not??
Keep us posted:))